Information Flow Wrecks Havoc!

Reported by: Benton deLaw
In an all out attempt to take over the realms, evil villains ran rampant over citizens rights, reported local patrons. The cry came up immediately, and chaos ensued.

With the communication breakdown stock prices plummeted and all things looked grim.

“My privacy has been threatened!” cried one angry mob, while several others continued to fight over semantics.

“Its as if Fate has spat on me in a discourteous manner!” exclaimed one angry complainant. “I’ve been brainwashed to believe in something that cannot exist!” gasped another.

As the claws of terror sank into the community the mayor was no where to be found.

“It’s August, he’s in Rio in August” stated his press agent.

When questioned local Authorities replied: “No comment, it’s not PC for us to take a side.”

The brutalization continues today as citizens persist to froth at the mouth.

“Will no one stop them?!” a frustrated by-stander was heard to say as the crowd dispersed for the night.

Local Lordship and Family: Foul Play or Unwise Shopping Decision?

–= Announcements =–

Reported by: Physhra Pink

Yesterday, Mild Manners, Lord of Zog, was found groveling before the Town Square as he and his sixteen children waited for Mrs. Lita Manners, who never returned from her shopping spree in the Rhydin Marketplace.

Mrs. Lita Manners is an frequent visitor to the Marketplace and is fond of wearing leather.

At 3:43 p.m., Mrs. Lialot reported seeing Mr. Manners carrying a large sack which he dumped over the Westend pier.

Authorities denied assistance, demanding that no crime could have been committed.

In a related story: Authorities Report no crime in any district. The phenomenal no crime wave continues into it’s 11th year according to their spokesperson who refuses to allow us to mention their name.

Seeking information on relics and other sundry items. “Eclectic Curios” rewards information handsomely. “Eclectic Curios” offers a wide selection of collectibles, catering to the mystical, magical, and ancient connoisseurs.Contact: C Wraithburn

Cooking Classes offered at local Red Dragon Inn by FishNChips Sawyer. Thursdays, 1am by the Eastern Clock. “Ya’ll come fer dinner, now, ya hear!”

Seeking information of Kitian and her sister Molly, last seen in the Red Dragon Inn, in or around Wednesday, August 08, 2001 by the common calendar. Any information will be handsomely rewarded. Contact: C Wraithburn


Got A Problem You need taken care of?

Call me, MaxTheMillersSon

“I do the dirty work you don’t want to!”

Missing Child!!! Anyone with information regarding Claudia Realm Blackheart, six-year old adopted daughter of Sid. Contact: ObsdnShayd

Flesh Eater Sighted in Local Bar!

–= Announcements Cont. =–

Reported by: Sharon Gossip

In a passing conversation this reporter heard of flesh eating fay invading a popular local establishment. Upon further investigation it was discovered that such events are not uncommon in the many realms we live in, but some caution should be taken when risking one’s life in a bar: Nothing but bones may be left of the dead.

Digging deeper into this mystery revealed a darker conspiracy concerning a box, someone named “Kitian and her sister Molly” and a handful of suspicious looking characters that included a ten-foot demon, a dragon and someone named Dauglazon as well as the well-known Curios Collector, Cornelius Wraithburn.

More on this story as this reporter can dig it up!

From Rogut to Regal, come to our beverage tasting soirees at your local Red Dragon Keep, Wednesdays and Fridays 11pm by the Eastern Clock.

Do you want your words touched, fondled, folded, spindled… maybe even… mutilated? ::wink, wink, nudge, nudge.:: Come write for the paper that reaches the world; one way or another! Contact: Physhra Pink

Birth Anouncement!!! Mrs. Hubbard of 131/2 Old Shoe Lane, proudly announces the birth of her 43rd child, 27th son, “Rat Boy”, (named after her favorite side-show freak), at 6:30 am EST, 08/12/01.

Loyal Zombie Henchmen stinking up the jobs of late? Worry no more!!! Try “Zom-Breez”

It’s a breath of fresh air! *Available at most commercial outlets.

BigBobs BlasterMart offers discount prices for trade-ins. Specializing in high-tech merchandise, some space craft even accepted! Contact: BigBobs BlasterMart

Seeking whereabouts of one Lusiphur. Contact: Blinkynn

Scene & Heard

–= Help Wanted =–

It’s Eye Spy, Eagle Eye, reporting the buzz from glitz to gutter!

Oh, my, did anyone else see that ten-foot tall demon in the Red Dragon the other night?! Surely he had to stoop just to get in the door! And he brought his pet along for the nights festivities. If you guessed a Dragon, you must have been there! Or you’re psychic, which, in these realms, isn’t all that unusual, kiddies!

Mind reading happens, lets face it! No matter where you go today it seems there is always some little psi-jerk just laying in wait to read my dirty, little mind! Oh, don’t you just love it when they get it right?

So what’s with the box, anyway? Anybody out there gotta clue? Did anyone get a look at what’s inside the frelling thing?! I mean, what’s a box if it doesn’t hold diamonds, right girls?

Mr. Wraithburn of “Eclectic Curios” is offering a rather handsome reward for information on “Kitian and her sister Molly.” I wonder if this has anything to do with the “box”? This reporter is stumped, any information “volunteered” may not earn you a high reward but I’ll buy you a few cocktails!

Watch for me, kiddies!As always, I’ll be out and about, getting scene and heard!

SEF seeks nefarious employment. Contact: ElfessTrinity006.

Three hundred pound ape looking for work on the docks. Previous work history deceased. Contact: Apeman8675309

Relics, ancient knick-knacks and other paraphernalia wanted. Contact: C Wraithburn

7 milk maids seeking new position. Contact: Marys Little Lamb.

Heavily armed Jedi Knight looking for steady local employment. Have three kids, five ex-wives and a helluva mortgage! Contact: JediFallenonhardtimes

Reporter seeking a “Deep Throat” of their own! Like to eavesdrop? Know things that others don’t? Enjoy indulging in gossip? Just wanna “clear your soul”? Contact: Sharon Gossip

–= Advertise Through US! =–

–= Gotta Ad? =–

The Evening Shroud offers competitive prices to all! Advertise through us! We are the paper that reaches the people! Whether it is wrapped in fish or not! Assassins’, a little slow in the targets? Demimondes’ need a few more clients? Tavern owners, need more of a crowd to make your bills?

Contact: Physhra Pink

No paper goes through as many hands as ours! From the streets to the markets into your very homes! Need a job? Place an ad with us! Have an important announcement? Let us tell the world for you! We can’t guarantee they’ll read it; you can lead a horse to water but… At least we try!

Contact: Sharon Gossip