The Evening Shroud, Issue #03, 08/30/01 Page 9

HOROSCOPES

Regular old Horoscopes are dull, boring and fairly predictable. We’ve decided that everyone needs a challenge at times, and so here’s your challenge, should you choose to accept it! Below are horoscopes for person/places/things. Guess the correct answers and win a prize! Quick! Send in your answers now, only one week left before we announce the winners!

(Disclaimer – if you find you are one of the correct answers, prize award is null and void. Management of the paper is not to be held liable if indeed your horoscope is published and you run into bad times. Prize is a free 1 year subscription to this phine piece of phishrap!)

Brought to you by Mystic Zotix  
aries.gif (231 bytes)Aries
taurus.gif (228 bytes)Taurus
gemini.gif (201 bytes)Gemini
cancer.gif (239 bytes)Cancer
leo.gif (238 bytes)Leo
virgo.gif (226 bytes)Virgo
libra.gif (158 bytes)Libra
scorpio.gif (176 bytes)Scorpio
sagittarius.gif (154 bytes)Sagittarius
capricorn.gif (188 bytes)Capricorn
aquarius.gif (178 bytes)Aquarius
pisces.gif (169 bytes)Pisces

Aries

You might want to prepare for uninvited guests today. Arguments will be common for a while to come. Stock up on necessities, it could be a long hard road. Make plenty of allies, you’ll need them soon. Don’t fall into false testimonies. People will be watching you for some time to come.

Taurus

Travel looks good today. Make your plans now for extended business trips. People around you may not understand what you are doing, but they will shortly, so don’t waste a lot of time explaining. You’ll need to watch your step, keep people around you that you trust. Don’t forget to pack your socks.

Gemini

The stars hold many changes in store for you, in keeping with the dual nature of your sign. There are many strange forces at work in your destiny. Take care that a hasty choice you make not. Take all things into consideration, for your path may take a dark turn if you do not look at all things available to you.

Cancer

Veni, Vidi, Vici! You’ve got upward movement in your chosen career field. Goverment is for you! People will try to mold you into something they can use, but stand firm in your political ideals. Debate is your best friend and worst enemy. March is a bad month for you. Beware sharp objects and trust no one.

Leo

You are destined for greatness if you can just convince the people around you to accept you for your abilities, not your physical shortcomings. Keep an eye on the political situation around you, there will be many opportunites for advancement if you play your cards right. Be leery of family members who might be using you to further their own ends. A nasty rash on your chest may cause some problems down the road.

Virgo

Things are looking up for you. New relationships bring you into positions of power in the world. Accept gifts given and proposals of marriage. You can be Queen for a day if you watch yourself and don’t lose your head. You’ve more to you than meets the eye, but even that is argued about in scholarly circles. Beware of usrpers to your crown. You’ll need to open your eyes wide to see more.

Libra

You’re a person who loves to please those around you. You have a yearning to shed your noble calling and serve those around you, satisfying their hunger and thirst for knowledge and entertainment. A fine pair of shapely ankles could be your downfall.

Scorpio

There are some who call you brooding, malevolent, bloody minded even, but deep down there’s a spark of feeling. Don’t try to dig it out, you’ll need to keep an edge about you in business dealings. Keep a close eye on friends and family members in the next few days. Someone from your past may come to your attention again.

Sagittarius

Happy Day Archer! It seems that the establishment is hunting you down, but never fear, your talent for blending into your surroundings will save the day. You’re standing for the side of truth and justice, but don’t forget to seek out the maiden fair somewhere along the way. Outdoorsman, that’s you and this weekend looks like a good time to get away from it all. Someone important will be traveling into your life again soon. Better have your story straight by the time he gets here.

Capricorn

You have a strong sense of what’s right and have been accused of crusading for causes near and dear to your heart. Don’t ignore your family members in your quest to right wrongs. Keep trustworthy people around you at all times to care for your interests at home while you’re abroad.

Aquarius

With that royal attitude, you’ll go far. You seek out those less respectable than you, and seem to get along well with the bad boys. Your home will suffer major trauma with your stubborn attitude. Learn to give a little. You’ll find yourself chained to your job in the near future, but a shift of power will fix that rather quickly. Don’t fall for the wrong man, or you’ll be needing family therapy.

Pisces

People don’t understand your work. You’re a cut above the rest. Although you throw your heart and soul into your job, remember that some people would find it criminal how easily you get away with things. You’ll work best at a night job, when others are sleeping. Secrecy is your middle name. Or was that insanity? Sharp objects are your friends. Stay away from boiler rooms.


Somewhere in the list exist the person/place/thing, can you figure out who/what/where belongs to which month?

LdyBelial, BattlePoet, Julius Caeser, Niamh deMannon, Right Said Fred, Robin Hood, ObsdnShayd, Black Panthr, Leia Organa, Corwyn Lankyn, Italy, Richard the Lion Heart, Ranger Blue, Dark Helmet, Acelin Adams, Lucius DeAuster, Anne Boleyn, Jack Stranger, Jack Tripper, Jack the Ripper, Lord Brutin, Napoleon Bonaparte, Kitian Albaelia, RDI Grail, Adolf Hitler, Belissica M, Nomad, Darth Vader, Yoda, Germany, Freddy Krueger, A Red Dragon

Note: Yes, there are more than 12 names listed here. Can’t make it too easy now, can we?